Harsh Language & Innocence

This afternoon my roommate, Brett and I went grocery shopping. Usually I go to Trader Joe's, the healthy/mostly organic grocery store. Today, we went to a more typical supermarket. Although it was not in a sketchy neighborhood, the customers were a bit different than those found in Trader Joe's or Whole Foods. Such stores are mostly filled with twenty-something females toting baskets of organic mixed greens, a couple pieces of fruit, some soy milk, hummus maybe some artisan pita chips and tea. It's normal to over hear a mother chatting with her trendy-clothed 8-year-old about tilapia versus salmon preferences while wondering how she popped out babies and still wears a size 2.

The store we shopped at today was filled with a more working class type clientele. The moms looked like moms and the kids looked like they came from a playground, not a Burberry Ad. I didn't see any gluten-free, vegan or organic signs and I was the best-dress customer in just jeans and a tank. All in all, it was what I'd classify as typical middle class supermarket.

While Brett searched for Hamburger Helper, I perused the oatmeal aisle calculating calorie/fiber/sugar content and unit price of each box (hence why it takes me an insane amount of time to shop). As I finally made my decision I heard a woman angrily spitting out vulgarity filled sentences. I assumed she was on the phone with a friend complaining about a man or maybe yelling at her husband.

Sadly, as I turned the corner I saw the woman, standing at her shopping cart looking down at a beautiful, little girl who must have been her daughter. The girl could not have been older than six. She was not crying, whining, screaming or misbehaving in any manner. She simply was standing in front of the mother's shopping cart. She wasn't blocking the cart intending to disrupt her mother's shopping experience. She was just standing there looking at something.

I looked at the woman (or shall I say stared in bewilderment) as she cruelly yelled the exact words, "Bitch get your fucking ass out of my way."

I'm not sure if my jaw literally dropped.

I looked down at the skinny little girl. Her body was tiny, but her eyes were huge and bright. The type of eyes you only see on a young child, glistening with a sense of innocence we lose with age. The kind of eyes possessing the power power to simultaneously fill your heart with love, happiness, nostalgia and at times sadness.

Silently the girl looked up at her mother in fear. She looked as though she wanted to cry, but she kept it in. She just stood there, completely still with a wide-eyed blank expression. My heart broke. I wanted to bend down and hug the girl, take her hand and do something nice for her. I wanted to confront the mother. I refrained from doing either in fear of my own safety.

I still can't stop thinking about the little girl. In general such language is offensive and unnecessary among adults. It's not only disrespectful, it shows a level of ignorance when one's vocabulary is packed with such words. I think it's even worse to use such words around children. Don't get me wrong, I tend to drop the F word here and there. However, using a dirty word is far different from using it in a mean way.

I couldn't help but think of how the little girl felt when her own mother called her "bitch." It was as if the word depreciated the child's value as a human being. What on earth could a child do to merit such hateful language? I can't grasp the full situation. Why the mom was so angry, how she could feel it's OK speaking like that to her daughter, how the girl felt and if it's normal for her to be spoken to like that.

Children can be brats and they can be annoying- they're children. I don't think any child of that age truly intends any hurt or harm. I don't believe a malicious 6-year-old exists. I wonder what will happen to that little girl. If her mom yells at her that way in public, what's life like behind closed doors? I wonder if she feels like her mommy really loves her, or if she's scared the tiniest little thing will make her mom mad at her.